Sunday, 27 November 2011

Possibility Thinking

Follow your a dreamer....walk toward life with your arms outstretched and your heart open to the possibilities. You may just surprise yourself. (H. McAlendin)
Be open and awake to yourself and what the universe has to offer you. Life is too be lived now; not tomorrow or the next day. I get tired of hearing women complain (I do it myself) about what we can't do rather than focusing on what we can. Old failure messages will creep up from time to time but that is your past talking. The past no longer exists and can't be changed. It's all about moving forward one step at a time.
You can do it! It's a message I have to remind myself of every day. We are sisters in this..let's help one another life each one another up!
Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Saturday, 26 November 2011

Recipes...Gifts and more...

With the coming of Christmas and New Years I wanted to post a few recipes and gift ideas that may appeal to women of all shapes and sizes! (for the men out there...something sparkly is always welcome! ) LOL

If you are anything like me, I like to have a special drink (or two) over the holidays. Not too long ago I tried a Choco-Caramel Martini and fell in love! I am a martini girl and love chocolate so the two in one combo was mind blowing! The recipe is below for those who wish to indulge....

    1 ounce of Baileys Irish Cream (carmel flavoured)
    1 ounce of  Vodka
    1 ounce of chocolate liqueur or creme de cacao

    Step 1: Drop several ice cubes into a shaker
    Step 2: Pour liquors into shaker
    Step 3: Shake together
    Step 4: Strain drink into a chilled Martini glass
    Garnish your Martini with chocolate shavings or chocolate flake.

I love home made gifts for Christmas; whether it be a card; baked goods; a knitted scarf or mittens. To me a home made gift means a lot of love and effort has been taken and that means so much more than money spent. I love to make ornaments and I bake every year so I've included the instructions for a simple but lovely ornament and a cookie recipe that will seduce your taste-buds.

Angel Ornament

Angel made of gold/white metallic tassel, wings are quilted satin glued to back, tied with metallic braid ending with bells. Measures 3"

Cappuccino Chocolate Chip Cookies


2 teaspoons instant coffee granules
1 tablespoon coffee-flavored liqueur*
1 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 cup softened unsalted butter
1/2 cup sugar
1 (1-ounce) square semi-sweet baking chocolate, melted, cooled
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 2/3 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 (12-ounce) package (2 cups) real semi-sweet chocolate chips


3 ounces white baking bar
2 teaspoons shortening


Heat oven to 375°F. Dissolve coffee granules in liqueur in small bowl. Combine brown sugar, butter and sugar in large bowl. Beat at medium speed, scraping bowl often, until well mixed. Add coffee mixture, chocolate, eggs and vanilla; continue beating until well mixed. Reduce speed to low; add flour, baking soda, cinnamon and salt. Beat until well mixed. Stir in chocolate chips.

Drop dough by rounded teaspoonfuls, 2 inches apart, onto ungreased cookie sheets. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes or until golden brown. Cool completely.

Melt white baking bar and shortening in 1-quart saucepan over low heat, stirring occasionally, until smooth (4 to 6 minutes). Drizzle over cooled cookies.

BOOKS!!!! I love books (obviously) and I am very pleased to have self pubbed a sexy, naughty Christmas story about a curvy girl who gets her high school sweetie! I am blessed that sales have been going well this month. It is in ebook format so if you are interested please take a peek. the title is, "Sweet as Christmas Candy".

You can also visit my website.
I have many titles available in softcover and ebook format from two publishers. XOXO Publishing and Eternal Press.

That's it for today although i will suggest if you are out and about shopping for the masses or someone special this holiday season; support your local small businesses, artists and artisans. They work hard to create some wonderful choices for you and family for Christmas!

So Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year too all! Have fun and enjoy your family and friends!

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Holiday Glam!

The holiday season is my favorite time of year. I love the lights, the glitz, the glam, the food! Everything is so colorful and bright and people just seem to be just a little bit nicer.

So....What to wear? My fiance is taking me out for dinner and dancing this New Years Eve. I have not been out for New Years in a number of years but I am so looking forward to it. But, now I have to go shopping for a new dress (darn it!).

Are full figured women bound to wear boring and black? NO! At one time a curvy girl was given little choice but to wear shapeless, baggy, black clothing that looked like she should be in mourning. NO MORE!

I, like many of my fellow voluptuous friends love to play with colour and this season it seems that colour is the way to go. If you do still want to wear black, don't be afraid to go for that plunging neckline or go out shining in sequins. Just because you are not a size 2 does not mean you have to limit your options.

You do however, have to make sure that whatever you buy, fits your particular shape and please don't try and squeeze yourself into a size smaller "just because". There are so many sexy, fun, curvy girl friendly options there just are no excuses!

If you have a tried and true outfit; add some sparkle with a chunky bejeweled bracelet or earrings or a brightly coloured scarf and a new pair of heels. Allow your true self to shine during the holidays. Women have curves for a reason. Don't be afraid to dress up and get noticed!

Be reasonable though. Most of us are well aware of what does and does not enhance our goddess like bodies. A wild print may not be the best option but a solid color or pin stripe may do the trick. Try things out; try them on and then go party like it's 2012! : )

I've provided some links to a few of my favourite plus sized online stores. Check them out! Remember just because you are "queen sized" does mean you have to dress like a pauper! It also does not mean you have to fork out a fortune either. There are so many sales and budget friendly places to buy that perfect holiday dress or outfit.

Don't  forget to have fun!

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Thursday, 17 November 2011

The Sisterhood

I was coming out of the subway station yesterday morning and was walking toward where I work when i noticed a startling malady amoungst women. Malaise.

Sad but true.

I normally get off a few blocks from my office in order to get a bit of a walk before work and I love to people watch but yesterday is the first day i noticed how miserable we women look.

Why is it we allow life; people; things get us down so much? Are we that wrapped up in other people's nonsense that we forget to live our own lives or revel in our own bliss? It seems so and that is such a sad commentary on modern life.

Life should be about finding joy and being happy, NOT dwelling on the past; or on people and things that have hurt us. What and who does that serve? NOBODY!

I have rough says too so I'm not trying to preach but i think as a collective we women (curvy or not) need to start spreading a message to other women......"Live, Love and Laugh". Don't you think we are worth it?

Is it easy? NO. But as an individual and as a group, YOU ARE WORTH THE EFFORT!

You won't find happiness in work or in anyone else until you can look at yourself in the mirror and find something to smile about.

If it's the past that is haunting you then leave it behind. Simple but the truth. The past is not something we can change. We have to accept it for what it was and walk forward.

Anger and bitterness does nothing but eat you alive from the inside out. It destroys the beauty within you abd denies you the peace and love of yourself that you so richly deserve.

If it's lack of forgiveness that is making you sad then forgive! Forgive yourself for past wrong doings and forgive others. Forgiving others is not about is about you. Forgiveness will give you peace of mind. The person you are holding a grudge against is living their life....Why shouldn't you?

Surround yourself with people that build you up and leave those who consistently tear you down behind you. As a woman we should be surrounding ourselves with likeminded sisters that will be their rto support and lift us and themselves t their highest potential.

Regardless of social class; race; religion women we share a common bond already....womanhood.

All of this is such common sense but we lose ourselves sometimes. Take a moment or a day to recentre. Stop allowing fear and incertainly or other peopl to cloud our judgement and our truth.

Truth is....You are a strong, loving, powerful woman! Share that and hold your head up and smile. Never be ashamed to hold out your hand for help...I'm here and so are so many others. You are not alone!

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Friday, 11 November 2011

Sex and the Curvy Girl

Yes I am going to blog about the "s" word. SEX
(disclaimer time.....this is MY PERSONAL OPINION only!)

There are so many misconceptions about plus sized women and sex. I have heard it all from..."they are fat so they can't..." ..."fat girls are all nymphos..."..."sex is the only way "they" can get a man or partner..."

Okay enough nonsense. Let's get some facts straight. Women, whether big or tall; small or not, enjoy their sexuality and if they don't then they need to start! Sexuality and deriving pleasure from sex has nothing to do with your size! (take that men of the world!).

Sexuality to me is about being comfortable with who and what you are and realizing that pleasure comes from knowing yourself and what you want. Confidence is derived from that as well and if you combine the two, you can't help but be a sexually dynamic woman.

If you are using your goddess given sexuality to keep a partner; too gain attention or to keep from being alone then you are using it for the wrong reasons. Sexuality is gift you give yourself and your chosen partner to express yourself and let's face it....too just downright have an awesome experience together (or alone).

And if you are in a relationship or not...and you are with a partner who just does not "get it" or "do it" right for you then show them how!!! YES...I said show them how. Have a "touch only" night. Touch yourself in front of your partner and then have them touch you. It's great foreplay and you may just learn something!

Use that bottle of massage oil on your nightstand that you bought on a whim. Sensual massage is awesome and may just give you and your partner some much needed relaxation time which can lead to......well....just use your imagination for once!!! GEE!!!

Learn how to touch and please yourself first because if you can't do that much then you won't be able to have your partner please you. And if they are doing something right for you then tell them.

Communication is a huge factor in a healthy, happy sex life. And yes, it can be learned.

I'm sure I am not telling anyone anything new but sometimes it helps to be reminded once in awhile.

Sexuality is a part of you. A part to be enjoyed. So the more you learn and the more you go forward in your life with confidence and self esteem, the happier you will be.

Curvy women are sexually know it....women know it. (think of it as your super power!!). But, use your power for good! : )

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Monday, 7 November 2011


I've never seen a smiling face that was not beautiful. ~Author Unknown
NEVER let your curves stop you from finding your bliss! It can all start with a smile....HAPPY MONDAY!!

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Thursday, 3 November 2011

How do you view yourself?

Admittedly, I am the first person to stick up for and advocate positive body imagery for women large and small. Outwardly I am confident and will shout to the roof tops that woman should feel and be confidant whether they are a size 2 or a size 22.

Here's a secret...I am not always as confident as I like to portray. And, I don't think I am alone in this. As a woman; a mother; a sister; a wife etc., we all wear many masks. Shameful but true. I, like all of us have a daily struggle with my self esteem. Why, when I come across as Ms. Militant Curvy Girl?

My weight and body issues have been a part of me since puberty. I was and sometimes still am an emotional eater. I am not as bad as I used to be but from time to time I will find myself grabbing the junk food or any food because I am scared; lonely; nervous: happy etc. I have issues in my not too distant past that at times make me very unsure of my own gifts in life. I know many women who feel the same. We consistently allow others opinions of us drive us to such distraction that we actually stop seeing our own gifts and beauty.

So when I look in the mirror what do I see? Some days I see a middle aged, chubby, silver haired woman who is tired and frustrated and scared of the world. Other days I think I'm "ok" and still other days I feel dynamic and sexy and I know I am a strong willed, fierce goddess. So...look in the mirror and be honest with what you see. Take a moment to filter out the other voices or messages that media or family or our past history puts in our heads...close your eyes and then look again. Has your view changed?

None of us are perfect and of that we should be glad. Perfect is without any uniqueness; no colour; no flare. Why can't we as curvy women celebrate ourselves?

I am hoping that by writing this blog on a regular basis that we can eventually start supporting one another in our uniqueness and believe it or not it helps me a great deal to know I am not alone. None of us are alone and I think that by sharing our thoughts and ideas we can change what we each see in the mirror.

Willing to take a chance to change your point of view of yourself? I am....take my hand and we'll help each other along the way. After all.....Doesn't a goddess Deserve nothing but the best? ; )

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

Barbie Culture

I was forwarded this picture on my facebook page a few days ago. Needless to say it has stirred up commentary and dialogue about body image like i have not heard in quite some time.

Before anyone comments...i am NOT putting up this ad as a kudos to this man or trying to sell his business BUT I do think it is an interesting way to get his message across. I think he had good intentions; some people don't think so.

SO....what do you think??

Your suggestions are appreciated. Have a story idea or body positive photo? Send it my way at

Until next time....

Heather McAlendin

heather mcalendin 2011